This is me.

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And I look good. Because, f*ck you, that’s why. Picture taken by Bat Sheva Creations (Facebook). I had just gotten my French Bulldog, Marie, and decided to have some pictures taken by a pro for dating profiles etc. Make-up: Bat Sheva. Dress: Hell Bunny. Hair: 100% natural. And I don’t care my teeth aren’t snow-white, I don’t care you can see I’m big from the neck down, I don’t care you can see the dumb “PMS made me smash a window” scar or the even dumber “I like that band, let’s get their logo tattooed on my hand” tattoo. I got a Hell Bunny dress and a ¬†Frenchie with one blue eye, and you don’t LOL. Because let’s face it, I represent the painful truth that fat people can be beautiful. Deal with it. I can’t get over the mystery of why fat people are collectively dismissed as ugly, when slim people with ugly faces get a chance for being slim. I’d rather be fat-assed than huge-nosed or meth-teethed. I mean no disrespect to people who would be considered ugly by others; I am trying to say: apparently fat people cannot be beautiful, and slim people cannot be ugly – while both statements are incorrect. Can you look at someone with a beautiful face and tell them they’re ugly because their ass needs a plus-size pair of pants? Or because their belly has an extra roll? Contrarywise, would you tell a person with an “ugly” face that they’re pretty because their weight isn’t striking? Makes no sense. If I were getting a little less hate – okay, a lot less – I would not feel bad about my body at all. I only do because society won’t let me feel any other way. Any moment of confidence and self-love is ended by a bunch of people showering me in dirty looks or calling “whale” at me. Does this face look like a whale’s?¬†1240599_206194872889984_522255070_n

No more.

Nobody should get to body-shame. Nobody gets to decree what a correct body is. Nobody gets to tell someone that they are abusing or disrespecting themselves just for not obsessing over fitness and being slim. And you know what? I’m not buying “concern” when it’s in the form of hating, bullying, and shaming! And even if there are health concerns? NONE OF ANYONE’S BUSINESS.

Certainly no reason to be mean.

And fitness supplements tend to be unhealthy, too. There are healthy obese people; I am one of them.
Fit women do not need to glorify themselves by putting down others. If they can’t shine without throwing shade on fat women, that says more about them than it does about us. I sure don’t go around shaming fit or slim women; I intend to live and let live – and demand to BE let live.

There’s something “subtly” hateful about those motivation pictures of “before and after” budybuilding women. The pictures tell you to stop looking one way (fat), and start looking the other (toned), and not to make excuses.

So you need an excuse to feel comfortable in your current body? Who are those “motivation” people to tell you what body to feel good in? I have believed it for so long, I believed they were right and the way I looked was incorrect, and that I “owed” it to myself to feel shitty about being fat. Why does a healthy overweight person need to make excuses or feel compelled to “get toned” in the first place? Even if they’re not healthy, it’s none of anybody’s business – plus, fit people get sick, too. Who’s to say that “firm and toned” is correct, and “fat and soft” isn’t? Doctors? Well, doctors will tell you that health is not just an issue of size and that some fat is actually healthy. Much unlike a lot of fitness supplements that can literally eat holes into your brain. I mean, what makes you think you should, daily, consume something that says “Do not use if you’re pregnant, nursing, old, young, fast heartrate, slow heartrate, epileptic, etc.”? Does that sound better than a burger? Really?
Why am I even made to feel like I need an excuse? Why can’t I just be the way I am without feeling guilty or embarassed or like I’m not treating myself right? And even if I were mistreating myself, how does that entitle others to diss me?

Why are people trying to tell me to feel guilty about not doing much about my weight? It’s not like I’m not trying at all, but I refuse to obsess over it anymore. And my only issue is the cellulite anyway. Otherwise, I’m quite okay being big. Why are women told to obsess about their appearance and feel bad when they don’t fit such and such ideal? Why do we have to feel like we deserve the hate we’re getting? Who are we hurting or offending by being big or soft? Nobody is telling ugly-faced women to get a nose job, nobody is telling small-breasted women to get a boob job, nobody is telling short women to have leg extension surgery and God forbid anyone were to tell a woman with kinky hair to straighten it. I mean, it is all well-marketed industries, but not as aggressive and omnipresent – and hateful – as the weight issue. You don’t see accusing and holier-than-thou pictures with the caption “What is your excuse” depicting a woman before and after facelift. Oh, so working out is more honest/healthy/real than surgery? Sure, especially with all those supplements…. And why do methods matter anyway? I don’t feel guilty about having had multiple procedures done. Why should I? Worked for me, all the belly went POOF in a matter of hours.

I’m fat and I’m healthy, and the only reason I’m not “fat and happy”, is because all the hate I get for being fat while I can’t remember having done anything to deserve it. Fat hate will be justified the day that “receding hairline” hate, “ugly nose” hate, “pudgy fingers” hate, “kinky hair” hate, or “short teeth” hate is justified. But you don’t see anyone hating that to this degree. Oh, so fat isn’t natural but big foreheads are? Well how about this: some are naturally predisposed to be heavier. And supplements are natural? Shaming people on Facebook is natural? Coloring your hair is natural? To hell with the natural argument, it’s invalid, nobody honestly cares about nature or health when dissing the appearance of others. It’s not about that, it’s 95% “look at me being all superior compared to those fatties and uglies” and an attempt to make it sound educated.

So screw this “What is your excuse” BS. Wanna know my excuse? Because eating a bag of chips at the movies is more fun than being a bunch of shallow douchebags’ reason to touch themselves.